Well, it is two days until my goal date where I wanted to reach 220lbs by - honestly, I am not sure at this point if I am going to be able to hit it. Yesterday I weighed less than I do today, and I really have no idea why. My break-up has been interfering a bit with my goal orientation, and although I am working very hard still, my head/heart hasn't entirely been dedicated to working out and losing weight the way I should.
It has also been trying to build more of a pattern towards long term balance - it seems like everything around my social life involves either eating or drinking. I am no different than anyone else, and I enjoy a burger or pizza just as much as anyone, so that makes it kind of tough to always be super dedicated and on target. It has also been hard because I am in the middle of exams with school and stuff, so I have to be careful about my mental acuity and staying somewhat functional with all of that jazz.
I'm also happy with where I am - I am nowhere near the peak shape I envision for myself, but the difference in how I look is truly dramatic. People comment on how athletic I look now, and I feel a lot better about myself and my appearance. Although I picked 220 pounds as a goal, I think that how I look right now is healthy. I think that 220 pounds is still a good goal, but the world won't end if I am only at 225 or so on May 15... then again, that sounds like defeatist talk to me and I am going to shoot for it just like I said I was.
It is amazing to me how easy it was to lose the first 20 or 30 pounds, and what a struggle the last few has been on my journey. Ah well, regardless of anything, I have definitely lost weight and regained my health... but what I probably need to do is regain my wardrobe. None of my pants or boxers fit right, and all of my shirts fit perfectly now, which makes for some very awkward looks indeed.
Two more days, two more days... then the rest of my life.
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